by
Donald Gunther
Editor's Thank you
Thank you Donald for the previous series of posts which shed light on the challenges faced by African American children of Parents with substance use disorders and your thoughtful recommendations as to how we can help the children thrive in the future. Thank you for this current post which reveals the fact that intergenerational healing is possible.
History is rooted in someone's story and that is why I am adamant about telling you mine. My roots started in Virginia (mom), grew down to North Carolina (dad) and sprouted up in New York. So, like any good seed you go down before you sprout up through many storms and seasons have come and gone and gave birth to a beautifully broken recovery story.
Metaphorically speaking some have said I write white and silently scream like I am black with my writings about my adverse childhood events that turned into post trauma stress disorders and complex traumas that would suppress my pain and tarnish my brain. My introduction to Intergenerational Trauma a life lesson that would turn my mess into a message.
Discovering a transformation so I can learn to transition from a beginning that perceived to be my end. Since birth, my family and culture have not been accepted or respected so being built to fail would be my family's reality or what I would see as a mess. The USA would underserve stigmatized and abuse my family's culture and humanity. My parents' traumas (reality) I perceived as just alphabets would be KKK and JC (Jim Crow) the protein that my ancestors were fed. Ironically, it has been said "you are what you eat ". Now I see why the soup that I consumed consisted of (A.C.E.P.T.S.D.) adverse childhood experiences and post trauma stress disorders. It was complicated, and I did not understand why my parents were feeding me this type of pain. My recovery process, many decades later with no parents in sight, would start an uncomfortable journey that is providing me an opportunity to emotionally detox from EMOTIONAL SCARS. In being transparent America I can hear my dad saying, " Son, I was blind, but you will see. " Well dad my response is thank you because your integrity provided for me. An integrity that no one would see, not even me. As you know MY eyesight as an underprivileged stigmatized and abused child was a perception not a reality. Since my next is now and my now is the next message or life lesson. I am still uncomfortable processing through the history of psychological abuse. Unfortunately, now you cannot tell who the abusers are! The trauma that was fed to us, unconsciously was our protein, starch, and vegetables as well. This is why an emotional detox is required for all African American Families who have suffered from psychological abuse. The Abuse that continues to happen and minimizes my trauma because those with eyesight suddenly become blind and those with ears suddenly become deaf. Metaphorically, I will stand on my three legs and sit down on the principles that you instilled in me. Ethics should prevent Exclusions; Integrity supports Inclusion and then we can value our Differences and validate Diversity.
My dad is no longer with me in the flesh some might consider him to be HISTORY. I have the pleasure of owning the flag of this veteran who served in WWII an HISTORICAL event that would birth a family disease known as addiction and many decades later with dad gone promote a generational change and allow the greatest metaphor to take place. A love story that would birth recovery. Recovery has given Isaiah, my son, an opportunity to speak about his story.
I am Donald Gunther, and this is my father’s chair, and I would like to share my seat with you!
