I have had a long and rewarding career as a substance use disorders professional. Still, there is one day that haunts me and probably will for the remainder of my career. A lawyer asked me to serve as an expert witness on behalf of his client, who was facing the potential permanent loss of custody of her daughter in the court system. The lawyer went on to say, Although the hearing has not occurred yet, the judge has probably already decided the case, since she won't allow the daughter to testify about how much she loves her mom.
The lawyer then handed me 1300 pages of social service progress notes on his client. These notes were so deficit based I knew that there was nothing written in these 1300 pages that would lead a judge to be empathetic to the birth mother’s cause. I conducted a strength-based interview with the mother, in prison. She was incarcerated for minor drug related offenses. I learned that she was an honor roll student and track star in high school. She enrolled in university following high school. At age 19 she fell in love with an older man. Through this relationship she was introduced to drugs. She started using to cope with feelings of abandonment when the relationship ended. He left shortly after their daughter was born. At the time I met with the mother she was arrested for, stealing goods from a store to buy drugs and food for one day. I immediately thought of the Lord’s Prayer, that says Give us this day our daily bread.
The day of the court appearance, the biological mother, who is African American showed up for court wearing a prison striped jump suit. Her hands and feet were shackled, and she was facing the possibility of total loss of custody of her daughter to White Foster parents. The only African Americans in the courtroom that day were me and the biological mother. This scene gave me images of slave auctions, where Africans were shackled, and their children were bought and sold.
During my testimony, the prosecutor asked me ‘yes’ or ‘no’ questions like, “Can stress lead to a relapse? Can parenting be stressful?” I answered ‘yes’ to both questions. Each time I tried to elaborate on my responses, the prosecutor asked the judge to silence my responses to questions I had responded to. A complete story could never be told about parenting in recovery.
I was able to share information about addiction and recovery during my testimony. The judge stated, “Your testimony is illuminating.” Then she told the biological mother that she would lose permanent loss of custody of her daughter. To say the mother was distraught would be an understatement. I will remember the look on her face when she learned that she would be separated from her daughter forever. Below are my recommendations for judges.
Make sure the voice of children is heard in these proceedings.
Change the format of the hearings. Child custody should not be manipulated by ‘yes’ or ‘no’ questions and answers. Whole stories need to be told.
Study addiction as a chronic disease. While it is progressive like cancer, I have never heard of a cancer patient losing custody of their children when symptoms return.
Be aware of your biases as a judge. Are there any racial or addictions biases which may impact your decisions in the court room?
Never allow mothers facing a loss of their children show up to court shackled.